You think its over but then... Slam! Stab. Bleeding...

I am bleeding again. Its amazing how your mind protects you and then when it gets done processing the information it can completely betray you and all the hurt and pain just comes rushing in. I just picked up final d-i-v-o-r-c-e papers a couple of days ago. I didn't look at them because I was not ready. Then today I was meeting with Jo Ann my friend and the attny for SBR and I showed them to her. When she explained it to me I was shocked. I mean how can it be that I am out of the house, he is out of my life, and I can still feel controlled by him? I just don't get it.

He will not see it that way at all. And in fact, he probably doesn't even mean it like that. I know he is hurting but he is just not that cruel. Or at least that is how I want to remember him.

Its just so hard to love someone and have them hurt and have you be the cause of that hurt and then in turn you hurt too.

And really, it is just legalities but Oh my gosh. I just feel like a wall came SLAMMING down in my reality and I just got STABBED and now I am BLEEDING all over again.

I am pulling out my book of Truths that I made at Brave Girls Camp. I am going to read it and try to get centered. I am going to try to let those truths speak to me and try to believe them...

In fact, here are some photos of my book.
















I

Brave Girls Unite

I had an AMAZING TIME at Brave Girls Camp! Melody and Kathy and their Brave Crew took amazing care of me and the rest of the attendees.

It was a time to share, laugh, cry, bond, trust, love, sing, create, and explore.

It was truly a life changing experience. One I will treasure forever and never forget.

Oh Canada!!

family in canada is soooo great!!

this is outside the Oval where they will be doing speedskating and curling...

Ok, Im here with my friend Jimmy in this place that has total Olympic fever. Its been very fun visiting the sites that will be filled with tons and tons of peeps on Friday. I have been visiting family while Jimmy does interviews for his documentary.

So here are a few pics from my adventure :)My wonderful cousins Ed and Sandra who opened their homes and hearts and have been amazing hosts!

I love Quachi!! He is soooo cute!

Cousin Ed and his new slippers. Olympic crap to buy all over the place and soooo expensive!this was an amazing lantern made from plastic bottles for the Lantern Festival that was part of the pre-olympics festivities.

The Traveling Princess travels!

My friend Debby sent me this. Its a card she got from a friend and she said she thought of me when she read it. Hmm... I wonder why?

from my friend Steenie: (OMG this can't be right! but super sweet!)

Urban Dictionary: elena

www.urbandictionary.com

Elena is another word for perfect.The root of the word comes from ancient fairy world, where perfect beings were called ELENA not many of them survived throughout time but some are still among us.

Im off to Seattle (where faeries live) and Vancouver to see my friend Jimmy and visit my family. I am so looking forward to it! Its been a whirlwind time in my life and I am so glad I have been able to get back to traveling which is what I love more than anything!

Last week I was at CHA Anaheim hosting the World's Largest Crop attempt and I networked my tail off! It was 15 hours a day of non-stop talking and when I wasnt talking to real people, apparently I was on my Blackberry. Im so addicted to my phone!
these photos were taken by my lovely friend Pam. she is one of the sweetest most amazing people i know and i am so glad she got to come with us!



yes, Im having a photo taken and talking on my Blackberry :)



Here i am captured on my perch by Photo Basics by Westcott. They were doing greenscreen fun at CHA.

I really do wish I was a fairy living in a mushroom house somewhere in a beautiful forest. Of course that forest would probably get cut down and i would be homeless anyway... oh gosh back to work and back to reality!