Becoming a mother at 46 and the adventure of having a baby unicorn!

Monday, September 17, 2012

Sad on the inside, flying on the outside

This would be the title of my book right now. 

I'm frustrated.  It's not happening fast enough. I'm not doing it right. I can't communicate well. I feel like a failure.

And yet, I'm flying on the outside because my life is really really good.

Friday, September 14, 2012

and now adding to the resume... writer?

13,000 homeless kids in San Diego last year.

This number is shocking to me.  I found this out when I had a meeting at San Diego Youth Services (SYDS).  This means that throughout 2011 13,000 kids came though their system.  Some live in group homes, some get placed with Foster Parents, but they are all AT RISK.

I met with the CEO and Program Director of SDYS last week to discuss hosting art classes for the at risk youth that they serve.  I want to get programs going even before we open the art center. This will not be the only group that benefits from the Art Center.  There will be many others and we plan to use technology to be able to reach anyone anywhere!

This is how I see it:

If you don't have a Mom or Dad, who is taking photos of you and documenting your life?

I want to do "About Me" pages/art with these kids.  They can come to the Charity Wings Art Center and we can take their photo and print it if they like, then guide them through an "About Me" creative project.

Here is my "About Me" page today...

I think ideally it would be something like a scrapbook/art journal page/canvas, something like that.  But I really want it to be something that they might keep through their life journey and be able to look back on when they are older.

Who knows what talent a child might discover if they just have the opportunity.

or what skill they might find for coping with the life they are living today.

But ultimately, i hope it will be something that they keep through their life journey and be able to look back on when they are older.  I hope they will remember who they were today.

We learn so much when we look at where we came from.  It reminds us how strong and resilient we really are.


Saturday, September 08, 2012

sometimes you can't shake the ugly crap that happens to you.

I truly believe that our experiences shape who we are, why we do what we do, and most importantly our personalities.

The things that happen to us, good and bad create "thens"...

What is a "then"?

Its the other half to the "if"...

I learned about "if, then" in 5th grade at Flora Vista Elementary school in 1982 at before school computer class.  Yep, my mom put me in computer class in 5th grade. She really had high hopes for me.  Actually it was me and my little brother who was in 3rd grade I guess.  We will just say we were gifted and lucky to have an incredible mom.

Ok, so back to "if, then"

If A then B

It's crazy but our lives are all about reacting to the "if,thens"

If I want to buy a dress, then I need to make money.

If I want to see my friends, then I need to make plans with them.

If I need to make time for art, then I need to .... You get it!  :)

Sometimes the "if, then" is something we just have in our head and its totally wrong. It's something that someone in our lives has made us believe is true but really, it no longer applies.

To be less cryptic. Here is a just scratching the surface example:

In my past relationship I felt like if I went out with my friends, then I would have to deal with an upset significant other.

Now I don't have that relationship anymore but the "if, then" still applies. 

why? It's not fair!  And unfortunately it works both ways.  We react to others and other react to us.

"if" I want to change this reaction, "then" I need to understand it and "then" I can work on fixing it.

See how many "if,thens" you are automatically succumbing to and make a change!

Thursday, September 06, 2012

U B U. This is my new favorite

So I really get things stuck in my head. Don't you? 

If you know me at all, you know I am a HAPPY PEOPLE.  This came about several years ago when my friend Brooke called me and said she heard on the radio a list of ten things Happy People do.  I was like, "I'm a Happy People!" and Brooke said she was too. So that is what we set out to be.  Now, this was a tough time in both our lives. Crappy relationships and such but through it all, we just kept remembering that we are Happy People.

So now, I was at a neighborhood party with a dear sweet friend Rachel and her daughter showed up wearing a figure skating/gymnast/synchronized swimming/baton twirler/who knows what else outfit.  She is a super cute little girl so it just worked and Rachel said, "I saw her leaving the house wearing this and I just said, you go girl.  You be You."

So that is my new thing. 

You Be You.

Or U.B.U.

In fact, there is a whole bunch that has spawned off of this....

  • U.B.U.2
  • MeBMe3
  • WeBWe3
  • HeBHe4
I know the numbers dont make sense, they are kind of a funny we went with!  But anyway.

Smile, be a Happy People and U.B.U.!