You think its over but then... Slam! Stab. Bleeding...

I am bleeding again. Its amazing how your mind protects you and then when it gets done processing the information it can completely betray you and all the hurt and pain just comes rushing in. I just picked up final d-i-v-o-r-c-e papers a couple of days ago. I didn't look at them because I was not ready. Then today I was meeting with Jo Ann my friend and the attny for SBR and I showed them to her. When she explained it to me I was shocked. I mean how can it be that I am out of the house, he is out of my life, and I can still feel controlled by him? I just don't get it.

He will not see it that way at all. And in fact, he probably doesn't even mean it like that. I know he is hurting but he is just not that cruel. Or at least that is how I want to remember him.

Its just so hard to love someone and have them hurt and have you be the cause of that hurt and then in turn you hurt too.

And really, it is just legalities but Oh my gosh. I just feel like a wall came SLAMMING down in my reality and I just got STABBED and now I am BLEEDING all over again.

I am pulling out my book of Truths that I made at Brave Girls Camp. I am going to read it and try to get centered. I am going to try to let those truths speak to me and try to believe them...

In fact, here are some photos of my book.
















I

Brave Girls Unite

I had an AMAZING TIME at Brave Girls Camp! Melody and Kathy and their Brave Crew took amazing care of me and the rest of the attendees.

It was a time to share, laugh, cry, bond, trust, love, sing, create, and explore.

It was truly a life changing experience. One I will treasure forever and never forget.

Oh Canada!!

family in canada is soooo great!!

this is outside the Oval where they will be doing speedskating and curling...

Ok, Im here with my friend Jimmy in this place that has total Olympic fever. Its been very fun visiting the sites that will be filled with tons and tons of peeps on Friday. I have been visiting family while Jimmy does interviews for his documentary.

So here are a few pics from my adventure :)My wonderful cousins Ed and Sandra who opened their homes and hearts and have been amazing hosts!

I love Quachi!! He is soooo cute!

Cousin Ed and his new slippers. Olympic crap to buy all over the place and soooo expensive!this was an amazing lantern made from plastic bottles for the Lantern Festival that was part of the pre-olympics festivities.

The Traveling Princess travels!

My friend Debby sent me this. Its a card she got from a friend and she said she thought of me when she read it. Hmm... I wonder why?

from my friend Steenie: (OMG this can't be right! but super sweet!)

Urban Dictionary: elena

www.urbandictionary.com

Elena is another word for perfect.The root of the word comes from ancient fairy world, where perfect beings were called ELENA not many of them survived throughout time but some are still among us.

Im off to Seattle (where faeries live) and Vancouver to see my friend Jimmy and visit my family. I am so looking forward to it! Its been a whirlwind time in my life and I am so glad I have been able to get back to traveling which is what I love more than anything!

Last week I was at CHA Anaheim hosting the World's Largest Crop attempt and I networked my tail off! It was 15 hours a day of non-stop talking and when I wasnt talking to real people, apparently I was on my Blackberry. Im so addicted to my phone!
these photos were taken by my lovely friend Pam. she is one of the sweetest most amazing people i know and i am so glad she got to come with us!



yes, Im having a photo taken and talking on my Blackberry :)



Here i am captured on my perch by Photo Basics by Westcott. They were doing greenscreen fun at CHA.

I really do wish I was a fairy living in a mushroom house somewhere in a beautiful forest. Of course that forest would probably get cut down and i would be homeless anyway... oh gosh back to work and back to reality!

can't stop laughing.... Sally Says-isms

Ok, I just have to write these down somewhere!

Sally Says-isms #1

Sally told me someone left a comment on her blog in Chinese. So I go there to translate for her and seriously, it was this super long comment that was too much for me to decipher so I sent it to my mom and asked her what it says. Here is her response:

You should delete this. It's refer to get XXX rated DVD. very BAD.


I laughed so hard then sent it to Sally and my lil bro for a gratuitous laugh.

Sally Says-isms #2

Last night as we were getting a drink at Carl's Jr Sally fills up a cup with some soda and then askes me why her lid wont stay on her cup. I say because that is a coffee lid.

Sally Says-isms #3

Sally comes over today to pick up some stuff at my brother's house where I am staying. My friend Albert who is from Spain is there helping with some website stuff etc.. so Sally is leaving and she says, "It was nice to finally meet Elena's brother. I love your house by the way." I say, Sally Albert is not my brother!" and she says, " I was wondering about the accent and not Chinese looking!"

Oh boy! I just love this girl! Going to spend a week with her starting Friday and I know for a fact I will be able to post more!

More Inspired

I want to be more inspiring. I am constantly inspired by people, places, art, etc... I can honestly say I am inspired by almost everything I experience everyday. I truly strive to be a better person, to make the right decisions, to leave a positive energy behind when I exit this life. I am learning. Slowly but surely.

I get to hear nice words because of what I do with Scrapbook Royalty but really, it is a selfish life I lead. I can't believe I get to do this every day and that I actually found my niche in the world. I have floated around so much and just never thought I'd settle into something that I am really good at. But I have and I feel selfish that it has turned out to be so amazingly perfect for me.

Here is a new logo that Rhonna Ferrar did for us. I just love it. and I just love her. See how lucky I am?!?



So, new years resolutions....

I want to learn to give people the benefit of the doubt. I want to find a way to turn a negative conversation into a positive one and I want to learn how to not jump on the gossip band wagon when it inevitably come rolling by. I don't know how to do this and I know I might not be able to do it overnight but writing it down makes me accountable so I am going to do my best to make it happen!

My Miss Vicky and 5 non-blondes!

Had a wonderful visit with Miss Vicky this weekend. Got to spend a little time creating this fun cross. Not sure if it is finished yet but I really loved going thru Miss Vicky's goodies and picking pieces to add.

We also went dancing in Downtown LA which is always fun. I love getting my groove on with Vicky. She is always game for anything. And how cute is she with her bump it? I told her she should wear it everyday!

And here we are with Anita, Hisaho, Hiroko, and Yuko. Hisaho came down for a visit and we all had dinner. It is always so nice to hang out with my crafty friends! All of us are Fiskateers by the way and we got to share some Fiska-love :)

One of these kids is doing their own thing! Can you tell which one it is?

Diva Craft Lounge Radio Show...

I just love the outpouring of support I get from my friends. Diva Danielle and Rayme Royale have invited me onto their show today at 12 noon to talk about all the amazing events we have coming up! Especially the Guinness Record attempt on January 23rd. If you have been under a rock and don't know about it.. (just kidding!!) visit the SBR website to get more info and join me for a fun fun fun day! We are trying to set a world record for the largest crop and we will be raising money for Kids In Need Foundation

The Diva Craft Lounge Radio Show reaches over 100 countries and is just the best best bestest! http://www.craftdiva.com/

you can even listen to it after the show is over so just go there and see how funny I sound!! :) I think I sound funny :)