OMG!! I know what my story is!!

I have a story! I didnt think I did. but I know what it is now!!

pretend it my picture and my name :)

People always ask me why I started Scrapbook Royalty and I say "because it is what I know how to do and I can do it well" But the real reason I stared Scrapbook Royalty, and I mean what it is today, not just a group of women having fun Scrapbooking and raising money for charity, the real reason I started SBR is because I needed to fill the gaping hole left in my life and in my heart from not being able to be a mother. I can't believe it took me so long to get this out of my mouth. Dang Brave Girls Camp!! Making me Grow!!


My whole life what I have dreamed of is having a husband and family with cute mixed babies... everyone knew I was going to end up with a non-asian husband. Heck I wanted to get surgury on my eyes to make them big and round all my teen years!

i pulled this picture off my other blog...

ok, so back to my story...Mine is not a fairy tale... not a traditional one anyway...

i have not read this book but it has peaked my curiosity

But that is what i had dreamed of... that was all i wanted and i spent my life falling in"love" over and over again, looking for the boy that wanted to marry me and make my dreams come true. Then I found one that looked really good. My mom had even checked his credit since she did his home loan ;) but the truth is, he was a good man who wanted to take care of me and would never cheat on me or leave me. So he got me and for a couple of years I figured we wouldn't try for a baby yet so I started Scrapbook Royalty and did a couple of events that first year. I loved that I had this awesome company to sink my heart and passion into. That I was good at it was a bonus and that I got to meet so many amazing people changed my life.

When we started the baby journey I thought, "easy, go off the pill and you get pregnant" But really, i had gone off the pill long before and didnt even think about the fact that I didnt get pregnant. I just thought we were careful with the dates and that i knew my body so well. What a surprise when we didnt get pregnant and then when we COULDN'T get pregnant. And then not knowing why. Why was this happening? My body and soul were rejecting him. the fates were not going to give in, I was not going to have a family with this man. Every month i would get my period and it would send me into a deep depression, It would be another knife stabbing me in my heart. the only thing that would keep me going is my non-profit and the sense of worthiness that i felt there. The community that needed me and that I needed right back.



And so I threw myself into Scrapbook Royalty and it saved me. It gave me purpose, it became my child that I nurtured and watched grow. It made me happy and I knew that if I left the planet that day, that moment, I would be leaving something beautiful on this planet. Scrapbook Royalty saved me.

Really needing to re-think this...

Life changing experiences...

What am I doing? I have spread myself so thin... nothing is getting enough of my attention and my commitment to the things I really want to do is wavering... I am not sure what it is but I know that I need to get my head straight. As of right now, I am still really struggling to get my life in order. I find myself spinning my wheels and I feel very off balance...

even my shadow is unbalanced

I know that moving to my new place, hopefully this week, getting my things out of storage, and getting rid of tons of stuff is really going to help. It is a blur the stuff in storage. I dont even know what I packed, what I took, didnt take, what i need. Its all a blur. That first 3 months of the divorce process really really really are lost to me.

So, being at Brave Girls Camp was really helpful in so many ways.

laughing with beautiful brave girl Brittany

I discovered some things about myself I didn't realize before. I have always thought of myself as an open book, as someone that does not have a problem saying almost anything in front of people and who does not hide myself from the world. Well, that is turning out to not be 100% true. I am totally able to write on this blog and on my "live worth living blog" but when it comes to talking out loud- believe it or not, I am not that good at it. I can talk in front of a crowd of women at an event. I can tell people what to do all day long but talking about myself to a group... well, that is a challenge to me. and I learned this about my self at Brave Girls Camp. Every time it came to me to speak, I immediately reverted to my comfortable Founder of Scrapbook Royalty persona and just talked about my non-profit. And basically "promoted it" but what I really wanted to share, what I would have loved to let out into the universe was my story, my pain, my grief, and my experience.

this is what it looks like when brave girls share

It was not until the last day of the camp, and literally, the last minute of the whole thing that I was finally able to say something real. I took out my computer and read my blog post from September of last year about "it". Oh boy was that hard!!!

Art I created at Brave Girls Camp

I thought it would be easy, i could share with these wonderful women whom I had come to love and adore, and i would be reading it so i would not have to worry about tripping over my words or sounding stupid. But holy crow! it was so hard. Reading the words and speaking the words out loud are profoundly different! It was hard to speak because I was crying so much. I have not cried like that in months. I turned to Melody who was sitting next to me and said," I have yet to bawl at Brave Girls Camp" and here I was, heart and soul exposed, but feeling better that I finally got to share my story. Like I said, it was the last minute of the camp, literally, so I didn'tt get much feedback but one of the people who talked to me about it was Grandma Myrna Jean.

Grandma Myrna Jean

She and I have bonded in such a loving way through these two camps. I just love her. She is the
epitome of a loving person whom you could just curl up with and feel so safe and loved. She thanked me for sharing my story, she said she didn't know what I had been through and was happy to have that information and that she loved me. It just made me happy to know that people who care about me got a chance to see the real me. Not hiding behind Scrapbook Royalty and "doing good" but the real me with tears on my face and all exposed.

Brave Girls Bus

On the bus ride down the mountain back to the airport, I spoke with Maureen, Rhonda, and Angela about SBR and where to go from here. Rachel and Sally were there giving feedback as well. it was so great. and they really opened my eyes to some things. The main thing is that I don't have a story... Sad isn't it. But so true! Scrapbook Royalty is not as successful as it can be because i don't have a story to tell that moves people. it is not enough to want to help creative people give. it needs to be for a reason. So i am going to come up with my story. I am going to share how Scrapbook Royalty saved me and how it has helped so many people. I am going to walk towards the "heart" and get to the soul of what is driving me and find a way to convey that to people in a way that motivates them to move and help...

Group photo fun on the dock

I will never forget the amazing women I met at this brave girls camp. They opened their hearts and they made me feel like I could fly. thank you ladies for all your love and support. I love you all!

I'm in Escrow!!!

I am seriously the luckiest girl in the world. I was blessed to be born to a mother whose love knows no bounds. She can't help but constantly be my hero and always make my life everything she hoped it would be. I fall down, she picks me up. I fall down again, and again and she is always there. She is not my friend, she is my mom and that is exactly how I like it. I have so many friends. I have so many shoulders to cry on. What I need is a mother and she is the best one I could ever have dreamed of having.

So...she bought a condo for me to live in!! We are in Escrow and I am hoping to be moving in in a couple of weeks. It is in San Marcos across the freeway from the college I graduated from. I can't believe how lucky I am. I absolutely love it!

So life is progressing exactly as it should, each day gets better and better and the blessings just don't stop coming.

I have to catch up on some work then I have a wonderful cousin to write about so stay tuned!

A New Scrapbook Club!

I am starting another Cool Scrapbook Club in Poway at Cool Scrapbook Stuff! Its going to be so fun. They just opened a "Crop Spot" a few stores down and it has plenty of room for a fun monthly gathering! Cool Scrapbook Stuff has an amazingly huge selection of products and I am very excited to be working with Gena on this fun project!

Pink Pineapple Scrapbook Club has been such a success and it is time to open another branch! I will still be hosting the Pink Pineapple Scrapbook Club on the 1st Thursday of the month and although we are using the same book, the kits and make and takes will be different!


The fun begins May 19th and we will meet the 3rd Weds of each month after that!


We will be using the book Delight in the Details by Lisa M. Pace for Inspiration.


Here is how it works:

* It's based on a 3 month cycle
* We will meet on the 3rd Wednesday of each month 6:30-8:30pm
* The book is optional and you can purchase it that night with your discount. Its our inspiration for crafting for that cycle
* Each meeting you will get a kit based on something from the book and you can take it home and create something with it. The following month you will bring your project for everyone to ooh! and ahh! over.
* We will also do a fun make and take
* We will chat about all the fun things going on in the crafting world
* There will be special guest speakers every cycle
* A special free crop just for Cool Scrapbook Club members!
* Discount on purchases made that night

The fee is $65 for a 3 month cycle or you can pay monthly $24 a month, (this will automatically charged to your credit card and you must have a card on file to use this option.) If you have to miss a meeting, no worries, your kit will be waiting for you at the store so you can join in the fun the next month!


Its social, fun, and inspiring! Meet other crafters that are as addicted as you are!

I hope you can join me!

Happy Birthday "King" Jesse

Life goes on and on... and isn't it fun to have good friends to have it go on and on with!

It was the lovely "King" Jesse's Birthday last week and we went to a neat bar called "Vin De Syrah" in downtown San Diego. Jesse got a booth and invited a bunch of her friends. The place is really neat. Alice in Wonderland Themed. When you get there you walk downstairs "down the rabbit hole" and then have to find your way in while the people inside are watching you are camera try the wrong door and standing there bewildered. The door is hidden and you have to figure it out. "drink me, eat me" ha ha. Well, we finally got in and people cheered and laughed. Although it didn't take us more than 1 minute but im sure it was funny to watch...

Here is a picture of Jesse and I. I just love this girl. She has been an awesome friend and I have known her since she was just a little high schooler and what an amazing woman she has become. She helps at all the Scrapbook Royalty events. Even the ones that bring her to tears. She visited me when I was living in Taiwan, and she was there for me in one of my darkest times. I will always cherish my friendship with her. We had so much fun celebrating. We never did find a sharpie to draw on her fake mustache. She is addicted to them, not sure exactly why but then again, she is "King" Jesse!

Jesse invited Albert as well. Who doesn't love this guy? (YES, he is probably holding me up. We had a $300 bar tab to spend to get the booth!) He has been such a great friend and so dedicated to helping me with the website. I am so grateful for the amazing support of my family and friends these past few months. There were so many days I couldn't imagine getting through and I can't believe I did.

GRATEFUL....

Today is significant

or is it? It would have been my 7 year wedding anniversary and yes, I guess that is significant. I posted on my other blog about it. If you've never found that other blog, it is at the bottom of this blog on the right column.

So... today is significant. I don't know what I feel about it but I know that I am still doing the right thing and on the right path...

LA pics

I had a really fun day with my friend Albert in LA. if you scroll down you can hear more about it.

Here are a few pics from the fun...

Albert surprised me and took me to an awesome Spanish Restaurant for Tapas. Called Bazaar. it was in the SLS Hotel near the Beverly Center and it was super yummy! Did I mention Albert is from Spain. It was really yummy and so beautiful. I didn't get any pics of the restaurant but totally recommend it!



gotta love the night time /timer setting on a little point and shoot! This was at my friend Grace's rooftop flat in downtown LA. The view was so amazing! and it was so good to see Grace! Ive known her for most of her life because our mom's went to school together!


We went to the Edison Club for a drink after touring Grace's apartment. It is such an amazing club. totally recommend if you are in LA


and some cool art on the side of a building. i think this was the at&t building but can't remember...

Wen is amazing!

Wen is an amazing artists and my little brother Eric's girlfriend. I think of her as a sister and I just love her! She did this sketch of Me, Eric, and her and it is so awesome!
Then today she posted this on facebook! I love that I am about to kick Eric's A**!!

I feel strong now!

work-play-work-play-work

I promised Albert that when the website launched i would go with him to see Craig Ferguson. I did chain him to the computer for 2 weeks working like a volunteer slave most nights till 4 or 5 am...to finish it all. There were so many problems with the website. We had to move hosts 3 days before the launch and seriously it was just one problem and one bug after another! but its done and for the most part works amazing! I am so grateful that Albert really dedicated himself to this and took ownership of it. So many people have good intentions when it comes to volunteering but it is WORK and it is unpaid and it does get pushed to the bottom of the priority list and i get that... But! thank gof for Albert. He is a truly wonderful amazing person and i am so lucky to have him as a friend.

So, yesterday was the day so off to LA we went. It was fun but there was just one problem. We did not get in!! albert was so disappointed. We had tickets but we still didnt get in. Lame. Albert said they lost a fan but i bet he still watches the show :)

albert took some photos of us walking around LA. I swear he must be part Asian. he took pictures like and Asian tourist!

i will post them when he sends them so you can put a face to the name. and thank him when you see him at an event :) hee hee!

now back to work! Im so techie! i have my laptop plugged in and wireless card and yes Albert is driving and I am working!

Dove Peanut Butter Milk Chocolate!

Yum! The general concensus was totally yum!

I was sent some Dove Peanut Butter Milk Chocolate to review and I thought I'd share it with my Scrapbook Club Ladies. All self proclaimed Chocoholics :)

Everyone loved it!

They said it was smooth and rich and it definitely beats other chocolate peanut butter candies. Well, I came home with an empty bag if that tells you anything! I have to say, I am more of a dark chocolate girl but this was yum yum! just the right mix of sweet and salty!

So there you have it! A recommendation from 14 ladies who love chocolate!

And they have fan pages :)

• DOVE Chocolate Fan Page on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/dovechocolate
• DOVE Chocolate Twitter: http://twitter.com/dove_chocolate

Fan pages for chocolate! What could be better!


I wrote this review while participating in a blog tour campaign by Mom Central on behalf of DOVE and received samples DOVE Milk Chocolate with Peanut Butter products and a gift certificate to facilitate my review.

It would mean alot to me.

Elena update

This past 6 months has gone by so quickly. The decision to leave my husband, the move to my brother's house, trying to make Scrapbook Royalty able to continue.... Well, its been a struggle. There are so many things that need to happen and it seems they all need to happen at once. I know that everything will be ok, because it always is. But getting to "ok" is such a long way off still. Good moments, bad moments, crazy moments, they all seem to exist at one point in my day and sometimes, all at the same time.

So, the divorce is not final. There is still paperwork to sign and agreements to come to. I know it will be soon and that I am grateful for.
And Scrapbook Royalty although growing is still not at a point where it can support itself. And as hard as I try, I can't get it to happen fast enough.

The sadness sometimes settles in and it overwhelms me like a thick cloud that I can't find my way out of. Right now is one of those times. When everything is weighing so heavy on me and all I can do remember to put one foot in front of the other and keep moving forward.

And that is what I am doing. I am working towards a company that is viable and successful with a plan to be a happy person doing what I love. It would mean so much to me if you would sign up for Club Royalty. It is not something that requires you to do anything other than make a $20 donation to Scrapbook Royalty. The club comes with other benefits, but the initial sign up would just be to support my non-profit and help me keep this dream of mine alive and growing.
There are so many things happening that will propel me forward but without the foundation that Club Royalty can provide, I will not be able to do it....

Your support means the world to me.

What a Wonderful World...

I had so much fun this weekend I was on the floor laughing in my tutu!

















This past weekend was the Royalty over the Rainbow Retreat and I have to say that it was just amazing! We had artists that gave above and beyond. We had generous charity flowing throughout the room and we all got to laugh and play under a beautiful tulle rainbow!

Alisa Burke posted some beautyness on her blog...If you posted let me know so I can add your link!

Here are some photos from the day...

New Attitude New Jewelry!

I am giving myself an attitude adjustment! It's really important that when the "funk" takes over that I am able to pull myself out. It helps so much that I have amazing friends and a loving family to help me. I can't believe the support I get. It fills me up with warm sunlight and I know I am make it another day!





My lovely friend Miss Vicky is coming to help me with the next weekend's Royalty over the Rainbow event and she is going to teach a fun jewelry making class at my house! thursday March 18th 6pm -?? Can you come? Its $40 and you get to make an awesome bracelet or necklace... You choose. here is one that I made...

and a few samples of Miss Vicky's Amazing work! $10 of your class fee is going to Scrapbook Royalty!!

Come support and have some fun! You know I will hav a fairy fly by goodie for everyone!